Monday, September 30, 2013

I'm not going to college.

I get the same question from every team, usually multiple times. I used to hate answering it, because I'm afraid they won't like my answer.

"What are your plans after you finish high school?"

While I understand their curiosity about whether I plan to stay here or go to college in the states, I hate the pressure it puts on me. Because for the longest time, I knew what I was supposed to do, but I also knew what the world was telling me to do, and those two answers didn't exactly line up. As a matter of fact, they were exact opposites, and I didn't know what to do about it. I didn't know how people would respond. What would people think? What would my parents think?

For so long, I had my plans all laid out for me. I thought I would do like the average person- graduate high school, get a college degree, get a job, climb the corporate ladder- but since moving here, I've realized that those were my plans-not His, and His plans are so much better than mine could ever be. I think that sometimes, when we pursue God without abandon, its going to look at little crazy. People aren't necessarily going to agree with you, and you are going to stand out. You will be judged, you'll be mocked, you'll be persecuted, but above all else, you will be right where God wants you, and that's all that really matters. 

I've known now for a long time that Guatemala was where I was supposed to be, but I kept it a secret, because I was afraid of what I would have to face if people knew.  Everyone else seemed to think I should got to college, if nothing else but for the experience. After talking with a new friend in Washington, I've learned that "There's nothing more selfish than spending 4 years and $80,000 on an experience." That kind of puts it into perspective.

I think that if God is calling you to go to college, then by all means you better be there, but if he's not, why waste your resources for a degree that you'll never use?  And if you are in a season of waiting, if you're not sure what His plans are for your life, then do the only thing that you know for sure is what you've been called to do-make disciples. We live in such a time that it is so easy to go back to school if the Lord calls you to do so at a later time, so I think its okay to wait until God gives you the answers.

Its been cool the way that every time someone comes along and tells me that I'm wrong, making me doubt, God has sent someone to reassure me.

"For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord..."

And so I continue walking close to Him and seeking His guidance for my future.


  1. Amen Addisyn! I am almost 59 years old and still trying to follow Him with abandon! You are wiser than any college courses could "make" you. And you have touched my heart in a big way with this post. Please pray that my husband might feel the pull to Guatemala that I have been feeling for a while. I hope to see you there at VOH someday and thank you for those prayers answered!! (((HUGS)))!!!

  2. The important thing is you're where God is calling you to be. We should never shut the door on anything, because some times God's radical plan for us does line up with society and some times it doesn't. We need to be prepared to abandon ourselves and our plans either way. As I was getting ready to graduate from college 5 years ago I left the idea of accepting a secure job in the corporate world for a one year unpaid internship in India and people thought I was crazy. Little did any of us know that it would eventually lead to me also rejecting the job offer deferral a year later and moving to Thailand. However, at the same time, I've been using that very business degree I got for the benefit of God's kingdom through it all, and now am hoping and praying to open my own business as mission in the next couple of years.

  3. Yea! So excited for you as you follow HIS plans, rather than the plans of this world. We have raised our kids to follow their dreams and passions (knowing that their dreams and passions were from Him). While both my husband and I are college educated adults (only two years for me, though), we did not put any pressure on our kids to follow that path. We now have 7 kids in their 20s, and only 1 has a 4 year college degree. 1 attended 3 years of college, but has now taken some time off. 1 went straight into the military after high school, and another went to work full time. And, our three 20-something girls all spent 2 years at the community college (during their "high school years") and then pursued missions and ministry. We couldn't be more proud of any of their decision, as they have each followed the Lord's dreams and passions for their lives.

    On the flip side, our 4th daughter (you remember Hosanna?) just started at the community college (during her Jr. year of high school) and fully plans to get her BA degree by the age of 20 (because those are the plans and dreams that the Lord has given her).

    I LOVE that you shared that spending $80,000 on a college degree "just for the experience" could be the most selfish thing that you do. What a great perspective!

    Hugs to you and your family! We were so sad we couldn't see you all when you were in Washington.

    aka: Mama D.
    mama of 12

  4. I got my 4-year degree because it is what my parents expected of me. God hadn't yet revealed His plan for me...and, actually, it was by making the contacts that I made in college that I felt I had the permission to go into missions. I thought missionaries were all old people who already had their kids and were looking for something to do with their "empty nest syndrome." However, while I was getting my 4-year degree, I felt a call to study massage therapy. Knowing my parents would kill me if I "threw away" 2.5 years of college education to start an associate's degree, I buckled down and finished a semester early.

    These days, my mother goes on short-term mission trips, but my father thinks that helping people (as we do) is a bad choice. He believes that everyone needs to work hard and make their own way in life...which is why I needed a college degree.

    My bachelor's degree is in religious studies; so some days I pretend that I'm actually using it down here. However, I worry about the day that I get married and potentially stop doing mission work, about the day that I become a wife and a mother. I know my earthly father will react poorly, that he'll say I'm wasting my life, that he'll ask why they wasted that money on me to earn not just one but three college degrees (1 bachelor and 2 associates)...and, as sad as it sounds, I'll be able to look him in the eye and say, "I don't know, but it's what you wanted."

    As I mentioned, for me, college was a necessary step. I'm sure God would have found another way to give me a push if I hadn't gone and met the people I did. Some people find that push in a book. Some people find that push in a short-term trip. Some people find that push reading an article or listening to a song. Some people find that push by coming as a missionary kid. For me, 2 years (my sophomore and junior years) of college and the people I met during that time were my push. (Granted, it took several more little pushes, but without that one, I think God would have needed another tactic. He knew the family I would be born into, though; so that push worked just fine.

  5. "And so i continue walking close to Him and seeking His guidance for my future"

    Writing as a mother and grandmother, i know that for many to have a daughter or a grandchild with such devotion as yours, Addisyn, would be the answer to their prayers and the joy of their hearts.

    Your faithfulness is a delight to the Lord.

    "Faith glorifies God exceedingly, because it proves that we have more confidence in His eyesight than in our own." (C.H. Mackintosh)

  6. Kalyn, our oldest daughter, feels exactly the same one could accept the answer that she was going to "follow what the LORD" showed her, and that wasn't college like everyone else. We were called irresponsible parents for now forcing her out...
    I love seeing your heart and pray that others like you and Kalyn will continue to have the courage to follow what the LORD shows you, in spite of what others think. P.S. guess where Kalyn is going to work? Ask your mom

  7. Addisyn, you're such a wise wise girl.
    So much more mature in your walk with the Lord, than most kids of your age and many many older people.
    I learn so much of the things you're writing!
    You just go girl and follow the path God is leading you on.
    You're such a blessing for the people God brings on your path, whether in Guatemala or reading your blog, all over the world!
    May God bless you in a mighty way!
    All the way from the Netherlands, Ellen

  8. Just found your blog, and this post made me smile. I'm not an MK and I did get a college degree, but I did it from home. So many people lament that I missed the experience, but I couldn't be happier. Don't let the naysayers discourage you! God's way is so much better.

    (I'm looking forward to exploring the rest of your blog.)

  9. Wow great post! I really enjoy reading your blog. Your whole family inspires, but especially you. You're not the average teenage girl. There aren't many girls who completely leave the life they've known their whole life to give hope to others who may not have had a life if you wouldn't have given up yours. God is a reward of those who seek Him so just like you said while you've lost a lot you've gain more than most people will in their life time. You may think that their your mission and influence is in Guatemala (which it is) but you're inspiring, impacting and challenging people in the states all the time just simply by living your life out and letting us read about it! If you ask me, YOU are the one living the dream

  10. Amen. A thousand times amen. I adore you, Addisyn Block.